Cast and Carry

I had my 1st boyfriend when i was in 1st year high school. It lasted for only a month. And after that, it became my hobby to jump in and out of relationships to the point that i can no longer remember the number of boys that I’ve hurt intentionally. Having a guy beside me made me feel secured and beautiful. October 2005, i was diagnosed with dengue. Also early that year when i learned to smoke and drink alcohol. After few days in the hospital, the doctor told my family that my body was no longer responding to medications and blood transfusions. My family had to accept the fact that i will soon die. I could not remember all that happened because most of the times i was unconscious but the face of my tatay crying in ICU is very clear to me. So as my nanay's prayer, and how she uttered every word while crying. Morning after the doctor told my family about my condition, i got up, ate taho and my platelets count started to return to normal. I was not yet a believer that time but i...