Basta lang...

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Minsan may mga bagay na di na pwede. Ah well actually, madalas. May mga bagay tayong gusto pang gawin pero imposible na. Wala nang pagkakataon kase, basta lang. Di natin lagi kontrolado ang sitwasyon.

Sabi nila sakin, makaka move on din daw ako. One day daw, wala na yung pain. Puro happy memories na lang daw yun maalala ko. Sabi nila... Di ko na nga lang natatanong lagi if, kelan ba yun? 1 year? 2 years? 3? 4? Malamang hindi isang taon kasi, masakit pa. Baka hindi rin 2 years, ewan ko lang. Malalaman natin sa July... Gaano kaya katagal noh?

Dami ko pa gusto gawin. Dami ko pa plano. Pero alam ko naman na God's plan is way better than mine. Gusto ko kasi sana nun, magpunta rin kami Baguio. Tapos I was waiting nun na magkaron ng Tagalog na True Life retreat sa CCF (church) kasi dadalin ko sya. Gusto ko sana andun ako and ma-witness ko yung baptism nya. Gusto ko makita syang nag ddgroup nun. Marami pa kong gusto eh. Pero, di naman sya sakin. Kay Lord sya.

Pano ko ba ieexplain yun pain? Teka... Akala ko kasi dati masakit na yun breakups, ayyyy walang sinabi. Nung iniwan ako ni tatay, kami, para akong mamamatay. Hindi OA yan ah?! Nasaktan is not the right word. Diko alam. Kulang yung dictionary, walang salita para sa naramdaman ko. 

Anyway, wala naman dahilan ang article na to. Gusto ko lang ishare kasi si facebook ni-remind na naman ako ng mga Valentines date namin in the past.

Marami pa ko gusto gawin, gusto bilhin for him. Gusto ko pa paranas sa kanya yun mas maayos na buhay. I know kase naging mahirap yun pinagdaanan ng pamilya namin nung nag-aaral pa kame. Janitor sya, minsan construction worker, minsan wala. Minsan meron, pero di babayaran, tatakasan ng contractor. Tatakasan ng contractor pero di naman sya magrereklamo. Di nya kasi ugali yun, ang magreklamo. Sya yung taong kahit gawan mo ng masama, hindi gaganti. Magpapakumbaba pa. Wala pa kong nakilala sa buong buhay ko ng katulad ng ugali ng tatay ko. Mabuting tao sya (hindi perpekto). 

Dati nga nung bata pa kami, lagi kami nanghihingi ng piso pambili ng chichirya sa tindahan. Pero yun barya kasi ni tatay, pamasahe nya na sana yun sa work or sa pag-apply. Pero bibigay nya pa yun samin, kahit maglakad sya. Ay nako, itigil na nga ito.

Diko alam kung ano pinagdadaanan mo - kung bakit nagka interest ka basahin itong article ko. Pero kung may pagkakataon ka, wag ka maging madamot sa oras at pagmamahal. Wag ka maghintay ng kapalit, wag ka mag hold back. Also, make sure that God is the source of the love that you give. As we all know, we cannot give what we don't have. 

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